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Thursday, December 22, 2005 

Darlene's Perm

I am deeply in love with Colin Cowherd. You know...radio talk show host with ESPN, Monday thru Friday from 10 am to 1 pm (your welcome for the plug, Herd). Anyway, he is the most funny and straight-forward commentator I have ever heard. His wit is unmatched. But...he cut me deep today. Here is the short story.

Herd is bashing UFC...Ultimate Fighting Championship. He is claiming that the boys that grow up and fight like this are the ones who zipped up their cats in duffle bags and threw them on top of Kroger. He said that the only people who watch UFC are people living in Gary, Indiana and Middle of Nowhere, Kentucky...guys who fight over Darlene, who has a cold sore and a permenent...guys who go strut at their alma mater's football games five years after they graduated.

Here's my problem. I really enjoy the UFC. For some reason, even though I have to turn my head when a nose gets broken, I love to see two dummys beat each other senseless. It is genuinely entertaining for me. I live in Nicholasville...I love Nicholasville. I graduated with a hot slimmie named Darlene, who I swear, had a perm. And I still rock my decorated letter jacket to the games on Friday night.

You cut me deep, Herd.

I love my world.

Darlene? I don't remember her. About the UFC, I can't watch it - I can stand a bit of violence every now-and-then in the fictional movie, but something about that show just rubs me the wrong way. I was at a friend's house one night (long ago) and he loved it SO much...he glorified and was sucked into every blow. It seriously freaked me out. I'm sure you're not like that, but I always have that in my head when I see commercials for it.

I heard and the first thought in my head was...Wow could Colin be talking about anyone else but Smitty. WOW, what a coincidence!!

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